LeatherSIR?

Hmm.

Presented without further comment.

Mr. & Ms. Alameda County Leather Contest

I've been invited to judge the Alameda County Leather Corps contest in Hayward, CA at the end of June:

Mr. & Ms. Alameda County Leather 2012 Fri. June 29 and Sat June 30th The meet and Greet for the 21st Mr. & Ms. Alameda County Leather contest will be held at the World Famous Turf club Fri. June 29th starting at 6:30pm with a bbq and meet the contestants. Sat. June 30th continues with the Mr. & Ms. Alameda County title contest at the Humanists Hall in Oakland CA. Our judging panel for this year includes  The first Mr. Alameda County Leather Mark McKee, American LeatherWoman 2011 Trinity, Miss San Francisco Leather Bethie Bee, Northwest Leather Sir Jim Drew and Ms. World Leather 2001 Annie Romano. American Leatherboy Tyler will be judges boy and Mr. Alameda County Leather 1999 Mark Ingham will be tally master. Application attached and tickets availible soon.

Technically, I invited them to invite me.  When their first call for contestants went out in January, I sent them the offer to come down and be a judge for the contest.

Alameda County Leather Corps holds a place in my heart and my leather history, you see.  They were the first leather club I was a member of.  In the late 1990s, I lived in San Mateo (across the Bay from Hayward), a community with (to my knowledge) nothing to speak of in terms of a gay community, much less a leather one.  In the early 1990s, I had live further south, in San José and Sunnyvale, so despite doing most of my playing in San Francisco, I still felt my roots were or should be more toward the peninsula and the South Bay.  With the Brotherhood in San José not formed yet, Alameda County Leather Corps was my only option.

I really don't recommend trying to cross the San Mateo or Dumbarton bridges at late rush hour to get to 7:00 meetings.

There were four of us, I think, in my “class” when I joined, two of whom were Andrew “Bootdog” Johnson (International Mr. Bootblack 2008) and Joan Norry (American Leatherwoman 2008).  ACLC raises ’em right, let me tell you.

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Boot Maintenance

On Tuesday, February 7, Northwest Community Bootblack 2012 Ruin — my “SashBlack”, I’m her “SashSIR” — did a workshop called “Bootblacking 101: Simple, Speedy, and Sexy” at the Center for Sex-Positive Culture.

Over the course of about 45 minutes, she walked us through basic bootblacking — remove gunk, lightly wash, apply polish, remove excess polish, work the polish in, and buff to a shine.  She also addressed ways to make the blacking service sexy, whether in a public environment or private play.  Then she had us all do a basic blacking job on a boot we had brought (we were also to bring some basic supplies that she specified).

She intentionally avoided addressing more advanced subject such as blacking leather gear, dealing with oil tan and non-leather boots (although we discussed some of that in the Q&A), edge dressing, lacing styles, stripping polish, repairs, and so forth, since this was aimed as an introductory (“Simple”) workshop.  Daddy Wendell (past Northwest LeatherSIR and author of Making Leather Gear [go buy it]) was also there to aid, abet, and advise.

Just by having your boots done a few time, watching the bootblacks and seeing the similarities between when they all do, you can’t help but pick up most of this up.  (Of course, I’m the sort who does pay attention like that; lots of guys don’t or don’t care to.)  I did have a few specific questions, stuff like “About how much polish to you use as a starter amount?” and “Will putting a petroleum-based polish on oil-tan boots actually damage them, and in what way/how badly?”

I have never actually blacked my own boots before.  For years, I wasn’t even cognizant of the option and didn’t do more than clean them; so far as I can remember, there simply was no active bootblacking visible in the San Francisco Bay Area leather community in the 1990s.  A few years ago, I had a boyfriend who did mine a few times, and more recently, I have utilized the skilled services of our local and regional bootblacks.  So to that end, this was a great workshop for me specifically because of the expectation that the attendees actually get down and do the job.  (And I get a nicely spiffed up pair of my lace-up cowboy boots out of the deal.)

(I should revise that: I had never blacked my leather boots before.  Having been big into rubber in the past, and having competed for Mr. International Rubber twice, I have dealt with the equivalent of bootblacking for rubber boots before, and have advised some bootblacks on dealing with rubber boots in the past.)

I’ll never do blacking in any sort of a formal role — my neck, back, and knees couldn’t take it — but it’s great to be able to do an serviceable job on my own.  And to get a better understanding of what Ruin and her fellow bootblacks do… that’s invaluable.

(The contestant in me knows that at least one of my judges at International is a boot enthusiast, so I should be prepared for comments and questions about my boots.  Knowing boot blacking fundamentals is a plus there.)

Fundraising Through Better Fisting #2

The second of my title-year Chez Poing fisting parties has now come and gone.  (I’m not going to go into all the background and logistics on the subject again.  The earlier post has all that.)

• Invites went out to 92 guys.  Positive RSVPs came back for 34 (just under the 35-person cap), plus 9 “maybe/if I can” responses (of which I only expected a couple to show; that’s how those go).  25 guys showed, which is a little lower than I expected (I was aiming for 28, just above the largest party to date).  Out of town guests included Dariusz from Vancouver (who comes to almost every party) and Julio from Chicago.
• This was the second anniversary of the Chez Poing parties, although only the 8th one because I had to cancel May 2010 when my grandmother broke her hip.
• We had unseasonably warm weather for February, a run of 5 or 6 days that were sunny with highs in the low to mid 50s.
• Guys were great about bringing snacks and beverages.  I don’t think I’ll need to buy any beverages or chips for the May party.  (Robert was especially generous.  I asked him to pick up salsa, cookies, soda, and ice; he brought salsa, hummus, chips, cookies, soda, beer, and ice.  Lesson: this is what happens when you send a horny guy to the store on an empty stomach!)
• After expenses, another $168 from the Fist Kitty for my title travel fund.
• Special thanks to Cliff for trimming the ivy on my stairs and other exterior work; Cliff, Robert, and Rick for setup; Cliff and Rick for Sunday teardown (and joining me for dim sum); and Cliff and Bill for the loan of additional slings.

Next party will probably be Saturday, May 12.

Future fisting adventures:

• I plan to attend Fist Fest in Palm Springs in June.
• I have submitted proposals to be a presenter at Northern Exposure in Anchorage this summer.  Included are ones for sessions on Anal Fisting, Play Party Etiquette, and Hosting Play Parties.
• I’m looking into how to take the party on the road to Portland, probably with a couple afternoon workshops added on.
• I have access to a cabin at Lake Cushman (2.5 hours from Seattle) and hope to do a weekend–long party out there later this year.

Mid-Atlantic Leather 2012 • January 13–16, 2012

This was my 13th annual trip to Washington DC for Mid-Atlantic Leather weekend (URL).  It’s really Mr. Marcus’ (URL) fault: in early 1999, he asked if he had seen me at MAL that year, and when I said no, he told me I should go.  So I did.

I often tell people that they should go to IML or Folsom twice — the second time so they can realize that they enjoyed it more the first time.  That’s because the scope of those events are so huge, they can overwhelm you the first time, but a second time gives you the chance to evaluate what parts of the hugeness and spectacle work for you and what don’t.  In comparison, Mid-Atlantic Leather is to International Mr. Leather (URL) as Up Your Alley/Dore Alley (URL) is to Folsom Street Fair (URL) — still plenty big enough to bring in the critical mass to have a great, memorable weekend, but not so large as to be lost in the mass.  (So you should go at least three times.)

I don’t always buy the MAL weekend package — the REACTION dance in particular is a waste for me, and that’s a fair chunk of the price — but this year as a titleholder, I needed to be at the contest and at Leather Cocktails, so I sprung for it.

You can read more about my past MAL experiences here (URL).

Planes, Trains, and Automo… Hotel Rooms

One of the downsides to traveling from the West Coast to the East for events is the time lost in air travel.  Unless you can wrangle a direct flight, you loose the entire day  leave at 9 am, arrive at 7 pm.  (Coming back, of course, you get it all back [except for two tablespoons (URL)].)  So I was on the Delta (URL) red-eye Thursday night, into Minneapolis (MSP) and then to Baltimore (BWI).

Fortunately, I’ve learned some tricks for flying a red-eye:

• My usual bed time is after midnight anyway, so I’m heading toward sleep mode when I get to the airport.  No coffee in the evening to make sure I’m not kept awake.
• Get a window seat, to have something to lean against.
• Get a travel blindfold and earplugs.
• Take a travel bottle of alcohol (2–3 oz, in your toiletry bag in your carry-on) and imbibe around boarding.  This will help knock you out.  (For a long flight, going overseas, use NyQuil.  I don’t recommend that for an in-country night flight, though, especially one with a plane switch; you’ll be too groggy to function well.)
• For the trips to DC, I have a leather trench coat which I take for that event and otherwise only use a couple days a year.  It makes for a nice blanket.

The flight to MSP was uneventful.  I slept most of the three hours.  I did notice that our flight was the only thing going out of SEA after midnight, meaning that everyone in the airport other than staff was either on an overnight layover or on our flight.  Pretty damn deserted.

The woman in the aisle seat of my row, Laura, was heavily pregnant with twins, but still a couple months out from birth.

The flight from MSP to BWI was underpopulated, so we could spread out some.  I got a Caribou Coffee (URL) French Toast muffin (yummy) during the layover, but no coffee, and then slept the two hours to BWI, until ugly turbulence near Baltimore woke me up (some of the worst I’ve been in).  Laura was again in the same row, but across the aisle.  (And coming back to Seattle on Monday, Laura was again on both flights, two rows back on the first leg.)

Breakfast at BWI was coffee and a horrible piece of cheese pizza.  I caught the shuttle to the MARC train (URL), and then literally walked onto the train as soon as I got to the platform.  (Nice, since otherwise I would have to wait an hour for the next one.)  Then schlepped the bags a few blocks from Union Station (URL) to the Hyatt Regency Capitol Hill (URL).  (The new MAL hotel is much more convenient for train travelers than the Washington Plaza (URL) was.)

My roommate for the weekend was Ed, who lives in Maryland about an hour’s drive away.  We met (and played) a couple years ago.  He’s also a fister, so he brought his sling, arriving at the hotel about 90 minutes after me.  After I did some shopping, I laid down for a nap.  Probably 10 minutes later, in came Ed with a play buddy.  I told them to have fun, popped in my earplugs, and rolled over.  About 90 minutes later when I got up, Ed was playing with a different guy, and I never noticed him come in!

Shopping

One of the great aspects of MAL is that it is large enough to support a valid vendors market.  While not as huge as IML’s by any means, it still has maybe 30 vendors, including the likes of Mr. S (URL), LeatherMasters (URL), Ft. Troff (URL), CJ’s Leather (URL), Rubio (URL), NastyPig (URL), Tribal Son (URL), and many other stores and manufacturers of note.  Pretty much anything you want, you can get there.

The exception is porn.  When MAL was at the Plaza, DickWadd (URL) would always have a big table, blaring out their bareback porn vids on several screens at high volume.  This always irritated me a bit — not just because of the bareback nature, but the audio level was jarring and they tended to cause traffic jams.  I know IML has made a point of restricting some of the porn displays, especially the bareback producers, and I assume MAL has done similar.  They may have restricted all video porn, given that not only is DickWadd no longer present, none of the other companies have booths there either.  (Manhunt (URL) had a table, but they aren’t primarily video porn and had no screen displays anyway.)

As I’ve noted before, after 20+ years in leather, there’s little in the way of major items I don’t have that I want to buy.  This generally saves my wallet in the vendors mart.  Last year, my major purchase was a rubber apron.  This year, I bought a belt from The Bonding Company (URL), a butt plug and some nipple suction toys from Ft. Troff, some inhalants, a pin and a leather flag motorcycle license plate frame, and so on.

The most prominent purchase I made this year was a pair of neoprene wrist cuffs from Mr. S, to use with a boy I’ve been playing with who is vegan (and thus isn’t a fan of leather cuffs).  As a side-effect, the rubbery nature of these means they will slip less when in use; you’ve probably seen how tugging on leather cuffs will slide part of the cuff out and loosen things or pinch the skin, but these don’t do that as much.  I also investigated a neoprene hood for him, with removable eye and mouth guards, but they only had medium size.  (So I ordered a large one a couple days ago.)

Manhunt was giving away scarves with their logo in them.  That’s a good awareness of the time and place of the event — temps hovered just below freezing all weekend.  I will now store that scarf with the trench coat and be using it at MAL every year for some time to come.  They were also giving away peppermint lip balm (“chapsticks”, but that’s a trademarked name), also a great idea in a dry winter climate.  Good marketing, Manhunt!

Cocktails and Contests

Mid-Atlantic Leather grew out of an event called “Leather Cocktails” (URL) started by the Centaurs MC some thirty years ago, and that still forms the centerpiece of the MAL weekend.  Today, Leather Cocktails is a semi-formal event — get into the dress(ier) leathers, leave the slut attire in the room — and arguably the premier fancy leather event of the year.

The event is what it says it is, a big leather cocktail party, with a hosted bar and fancy appetizers (brie and cranberry pastry, multiple types of hamburger sliders, risotto with bay scallops prepared at the table, and so on; sufficient options to make for a light dinner).  This year, they either had really good dessert options or way too little of them prepared, because I never saw but one person with a plate of them, plus the empty dessert table.

I initially debated whether to treat Leather Cocktails as a sash event (URL) — I haven’t been to it in a few years, and my previous titles didn’t have sashes anyway, so I didn’t have a touchpoint for the trend.  I initially just wore the title vest, plus a leather shirt and my leather-accessorized Mac Leo kilt (URL), with tall boots.  Half an hour later, seeing the trend, I fetched the sash.

As an aside, I was pleased to see broad acceptance of kilts on the scene at MAL — and in DC in January, to boot, since they can be equated to “shorts weather” attire.  The kilt fad has faded in Seattle — not gone away but down to a normal level, no longer a “fad” (unless it’s set to bounce back this year!) — but I remember when it was at its height in Seattle but almost unknown in other parts of the country.  I wore mine to the bar at IML — in 2004 or so? — and you’d swear I was in drag, the number of guys who took a sudden interest in the ceiling.  This year at MAL, I didn’t detect any of that attitude.

The contest was held on Sunday afternoon (and that’s definitely a sash event).  This year, there were nine contestants — not a record, I think, but on the larger end from my memory of attending the contest in years past.

One of the unique items with MAL’s contest is that the contestants are asked a non-pop question: they get the question the day before (so they have a day to work on it) and craft it into a speech.  I can’t speak for the judges, of course, but as an audience member (and with a low tolerance for avoidance and bullshit), I was surprised that a couple of the contestants didn’t really answer their questions, one clearly dodged his, and one wandered all over the place for a couple minutes before finally answering his right at the end, almost as an afterthought.  While it’s valuable to tie in your personal leather themes and all that, remember that the audience expects you to answer the question, and if you don’t, you are letting them down.  (And the judges are partially paying attention to how the audience reacts to you.)  This isn’t just a matter of public speaking skills, it’s about keeping your goal in sight and actually getting there.

(Hell, you’d swear they were in a multi-candidate presidential debate: “How would you address the immigrant problem?”  “Immigrants aren’t nearly the problem that public funding for abortions are and this is how I would address that…”  Really, WTF?)

I spoke to one of the judges the next day, and he confirmed that the first and second place contestants were very clear in his scoring, and presumably for most of the judges, but third place wasn’t clear.  From the audience side, crowd reactions were clear matches for first and second, and probably for third (but I knew Matt a little personally, having met him at Folsom in September (URL), so his placement seemed reasonably clear to me but might not have been so to others).  This wasn’t just about stage-entering applause and such, though — in general, those three had good stage presence, character, and speaking ability in their question/speeches (including carry-through of question to answer, mentioned above).

Not strongly noted at the event, this was back-to-back wins for Pittsburgh, Matt Bronson following Doug (NAME) (who was a runner-up at IML).

Here is The Leather Journal’s coverage (URL) of this year’s event.

One thing that I found frustrating during the weekend was the low presence of other ILSb-family titleholders at the event, either last year’s or this year’s.  I met last year’s SIR and boy from Northeast, and last year’s boy and Bootblack from Mid-Atlantic.  Last year’s Northeast bootblack and this year’s Illinois Bootblack were also in the Parade of Titleholders, although I didn’t get to meet them directly.  International LeatherSIR Alan Penrod was also at the event, although I only saw him briefly, as was ILS 2006 (CHECK) Michael Congdon and apparently ILS 2010 Hugh, although I never saw him.  (I know he was supposed to be there and I’ve seen Facebook evidence, but we never ran into one another.  Hugh gave me a hard time at my contest this year about him seeing me once and only once at MAL 2011 — with the implication that I was busy playing the rest of the time — so I guess we’re even now).

I don’t have a handle on which feeder contests have occurred so far this year — Great Lakes, Northwest, Western Canada, others? — and I haven’t been seeing details on results or upcoming event dates.  As with the lack of ILSb family titleholders at Folsom last September, I would like to have the chance to meet some of my competitors (and the boys and bootblacks) ahead of the competition in July, but it doesn’t look like that will happen (unless I maybe get to CLAW (URL), but my April is going to be such a nasty mess that I don’t know if I can swing that).

Take Off Your Damned Hat

One thing that dismayed me during the contest was the number of guys in the audience wearing hats (oh, excuse me: “covers”) who apparently never learned that you take your hat off when the American flag is brought in and the National Anthem is played.  (Technically, military personnel in uniform are supposed to salute instead of removing the hat.  Few did that, likely because few have actually been in the military.)

Just in case you’ve got a question on this, here is the pertinent section from the government pamphlet Our Flag (page 11 of this PDF):

Title 36, Chapter 1—PATRIOTIC CUSTOMS

§301. National anthem; Star-Spangled Banner, conduct during playing

During rendition of the national anthem when the flag is displayed, all present except those in uniform should stand at attention facing the flag with the right hand over the heart.  Men not in uniform should remove their headdress with their right hand and hold it at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart.  Persons in uniform should render the military salute at the first note of the anthem and retain this position until the last note.  When the flag is not displayed, those present should face toward the music and act in the same manner they would if the flag were displayed there.

Take off the damned hat, or salute.  Show some respect.

(Boy, if this bit isn’t contest interview bait, I don’t know what is!)

Sex

Of course I’m going to save this subject for last.  How else an I’m going to get you to read the rest if I don’t use it as foreplay?  (grin)

In a nugget, this was the best MAL to date for me in terms of sex.  The last few years, I’ve gone to the FFA fisting parties (URL) more than once each weekend, technically keeping it as a reserve option if things weren’t looking good for play, but falling back to it regularly.  (Not that I’m saying that is a bad thing.  I love the FFA parties, and I missed seeing and playing with some of the guys I’ve met there the last few years.)

Part of having more and better sex this year is due to Ed having a sling in the room, although I actually only made use of it twice (and it’s not like you need a sling for fisting).   Possibly MAL was just sexier this year; I know The Leather Journal proclaimed this year better than last, the first year they were at the Hyatt.  I’m sure a bigger component of it is the title, though: not that I had more and better sex this year because I have the title, but because having the title encourages me to put myself out there a little differently, a little stronger.

Best Sex Coincidence: playing during the Miss America pageant, during the talent competition, and getting out of the sling just as Miss Wisconsin was announced.  (I’m mildly surprised emcee Frank Nowicki made no parallel of that to past MAL Alvin York during the contest.  Maybe Alvin wasn’t at MAL this year and the comparison would have been lost…)

Best Place to Have Sex at MAL: apparently my hotel bathroom after 2 am, given that I had sex there all three nights (after Ed went to bed).  You can manage quite a decent amount of kinky play in those small spaces, and the closed lid of the toilet makes a rather effective replacement for a sling.

Best Noisemaker: that would be me.  I’ve long joked that I need to record the audio from one of my play sessions, chop it up, and make a demo tape to send to Hollywood to get a job doing cartoon sound effects.  Thanks to Andrew videotaping a session, I now have a sample that could be used for just that.  (You think I’m kidding, don’t you? (URL))

That all said then, special thanks for a great time to Allan, Andrew, Bud, Dave, Jonathan (and his rubber catsuit), Mark (one less fisting cherry in the world now), Michael (now when can I get to Münich?  Maybe August 2013…), Randy (not Roger!), Spike, and Steve (I promise you a good fucking next year!).

And of course everyone else I met, chatted with, made out with, fruitlessly cruised, and so on during the weekend.  Congrats to Matt Bronson, the new Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather, and way to put the pressure on your sash wife for IMsL!  Steve Ranger, keep up the good work as president of the Centaurs.  Tom McCoy, Dave Rhodes, Michael Congdon, Roger Klorese, all the sexy rubber boys in the cold weather, Dean Ogren, Tom Savage, Boy Tyler, the list goes on…

Truly had a great time this year!

Fundraising Through Better Fisting

For my title year, I’ve decided to focus primarily on two fetish activities: fisting and foodplay.  Foodplay because there is so little focus on it that I can make it my own and have an impact as a result, and fisting because I’m already elbow-deep in the activity.  So something to polish and something to stretch; you decide which is which.

I have been “into” fisting (depending on how you define “into” it) for over a decade.  I could run down the details — yes, I call tell you name, location, and date of my first time — but suffice to say that I have played very regularly for the last few years.  And for the past two years, I have been hosting regular fisting play parties.

Fisting Parties

Part of what came out of my last relationship — in addition to us simply getting off on playing with others as well as each other ("good, giving, and game” — thanks Dan Savage!) — was play parties.  And after attending several together — including a small fisting party, a local monthly suck-n-fuck party, and a naturist potluck/orgy gathering — we hosted a holiday party for the naturist group at my house and decided we’d like to do a fisting party.

That first one was in January 2010, and we had about a dozen guys with two slings, a fuck bench, and a futon for play spaces.  I drew heavily on experiences with various other parties I had attended, large and small — the various locals ones I mentioned before, fisting and otherwise, plus FFA at MAL, MAFIA at IML, and Wet n’Hot.  Since then, I have done seven additional parties (plus another Olympians one), refining everything from the invite list to housecleaning to playspace layout.  I also did a Tribal Instinct education session for Seattle Men in Leather on “Play Parties: How to Go and How to Throw”.

Who Gets to Come, and Who Gets to Cum?

The fisting parties — dubbed “Chez Poing” by one of the attendees — average over 20 guys over the course of the evening, with the average attendance having inched up over time, dipping a little in the colder months.  (August 2011 was the most heavily attended, with 27 guys on the 27th.)

My invite list is collected primarily from people I or my ex have played with, so we know that they are suitable players and aren’t freaks, or at least are only good freaks.  (Yes, he and I are still on good terms, and he co-hosts the parties most of the time, helping with set up and being a play instigator.)  I also encourage regular attendees to bring guests along if they wish, but to let me know their name ahead of time.  Finally, I post that there will be a party on the Northwest Leather Calendar and on my online profiles, requesting people email me for an invite; if a guy will then send a name and facepic (“So I know who I’m opening the door to”; if they will put themselves out there enough and show me who they are, they are probably okay), I typically send them an invite.

The one thing I don’t do is to put out a “blind” invite — “Here’s my address, denizens of CraigsList, come one and all, and especially you tweakers!”  No, no, no!

The invite list is currently a bit over 90 people, and “Yes, I’ll attend” responses come in at 30–40% of that.  I cap the reservations at 35 guys (the limit I think the space can handle), asking people to (a) commit early and (b) if they have to cancel, cancel early so I can open up a slot for someone else.  Of the positive RSVPs, I expect around 75% to show; some cancel, and some just don;t show.

I also maintain a spreadsheet of replies and attendance over the last 5 parties (a year and a quarter).  Guys who attended regularly get recorded, but more importantly, guys who RSVP and then don’t show or who never RSVP also get recorded.  Get enough strikes against you for not showing and you get removed from the invite list (since you apparently don’t really want to attend).  It’s fine to cancel, even the afternoon of the party, but if you don’t show at all, then I’m left wondering if you’re dead in a ditch somewhere!).  Never showing up to a party at all, even if you do RSVP each time that you can’t attend, will eventually get you bumped of as well.  I also have a section for invitees from out of town — guys from Vancouver and Portland, but also as fa away as Houston — whom I know probably can’t make it, but whom I’m happy to invite on the off chance they will be in town; these guys don’t need to RSVP to stay on the invite list.  (And you know, if a fisting buddy from out of town was coming in, I would likely put together a party just for him if he wanted me to.)

(After reading all that: why yes, I am a Virgo, thanks!  But you know, it works!  I’m able to maintain a good handle on who to expect and have had no significant problems to date, beyond removing a couple people from the invite list who didn’t seem to be a good fit.)

I don’t actively try to keep a balance of top and bottoms.  That proved very difficult the one time I tried, and frankly, many of the guys are are least somewhat versatile.  The goal being the journey, we’ll all find some way to entertain ourselves even if there isn’t exact parity.

One last thing of note: as I say in more detail below, the selfish goal of these parties is for me to get some good fisting time in.  Attendees are encouraged to ask the host to play!

Pay to Play

When it came to being Northwest LeatherSIR, one of the fundraisers I was supposed to do was to benefit our titleholders travel fund, to ensure that I/we have the funds to travel both to the International contest in July and within our title region.  That sort of fundraising can be challenging, because while people and businesses are often willing to pony up donations to benefit a charity, “gas and hotel money to attend a contest in Portland or a bar night in Boise” doesn’t come as easily.

I have never wanted the play parties to become something that I tried to make money off of — they are intended primarily to grow and strengthen the local fisting community.  (Okay, even that is the secondary goal — the primary one is for me to be a huge fist piggie a few times a year!)  But putting the parties together does have a significant time impact (4-6 hours setup, usually with two of us) and costs $50–100 in supplies (snacks, beverages, lube, towels, gloves, etc., some of which carries forward for a future party or two.  No one has to worry about needing lube or supplies at my parties!).

After the first few parties, something I added was the Fist Kitty, a jar for donations, and a couple parties later, I added a maneki neko next to it (that’s one of the Japanese “lucky cat” figures, the sort with one arm raised up in a fist).  I then added the thumb of a black latex glove to the cat’s paw, making it a safer-sex Fist Kitty.  This one is animated, in fact: a battery keeps the arm moving.

More than recouping my costs, though, I know that strengthening a community happens when the community members are invested in the community.  I ask people to bring some snacks or beverages to share, or to donate to the Fist Kitty.  This allows people to feel some small piece of “ownership” of the party — even if they only brought a bag of chips, they are still contributing rather than just attending.  It earns them the right to feel that they belong at the event, and if they need to, to give me feedback about things.

During my title year, the Fist Kitty donations beyond the absolute costs are going directly to my title travel fund, and I’m letting people know that in the invites.  The last party raised $115 for the Fist Kitty travel fund, which puts me on track for perhaps $500 through the year — which should be enough to get me to Anchorage in June or to an event in Boise or other places.

Next Party

The next party is Saturday, February 4.  Want to come?  Send your name, pic, and a request to redhanky@soundskinky.com.  The party is intended for fisters with at least some experience.  You don’t have to have years of experience under your belt, but you should at least know enough of what you’re doing as top or bottom to not need a lot of hand holding (well, other than an ass holding the hand!).  In particular, you should come expecting and prepared to play; while you might end up socializing or watching instead, the goal is the journey and that involves play.

If you need mentoring — and even experienced, advanced players can have something to learn — there will be guys glad to help you with that, top or bottom. Now and then, we do have attendees lose their top or bottom cherry at a party (in August, one guy did both!), so even novices have a place here.

(Leather) Vacation in Palm Springs • December 24, 2011–January 3, 2012

(This post covers the small title piece of end-of-2011 vacation in Palm Springs.  The lengthy report for the rest of the trip is located on my Sounds Kinky-er blog.)

As Northwest LeatherSIR, I did take the title vest with me, wearing it out to the local leather bars, the Barracks and the Tool Shed. There was very little leather title presence during the time we were there (no events going on, of course).  I did run into former Mr. Palm Springs Leather 2009 John Kunz (whom I met last summer) and last year’s Southern California LeatherSIR 2011 Todd.  Stuff Todd told me reinforced that GLPW is honoring and supporting this year’s Northwest titleholders very well.