Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Leather Spirituality

During my contest interview, Luna asked for my views on Leather Spirituality (or maybe it was Leather and Spirituality; I’m going to treat those as the same thing, although they may not be).  I gave a somewhat rambling answer, circling around the question before landing on it.  (I’m not sure this post will do any better a job.)

Religion can be a sensitive subject in the gay and kink community, or at least practicing religion or even respect for it can be.  Declaring your disdain for it, or how you have overcome it, those are commonplace.

Some people reading this are thinking I made a jump from spirituality right into organized religion and are starting a mental protest.  And that’s true, so far as it goes, and it’s why my original answer had rambled.

I’m a PK, a Preacher’s Kid.  My father was a Presbyterian minister, who then shifted to become a Methodist minister about the time I was 10 or 11, I think.  (I don’t know the details, beyond that the small town church he served was jointly shared by both denominations and I think at least a third as well.)  To me, separating religion and spirituality doesn’t register.

I gave up on organized religion years ago.  I respect it.  I respect those who embrace it.  I value the Bible, I accept the validity (if not the explicit truth) of the Christ myth, etc., but I don’t have a need for the “organized” part of it, for the creation of community resulting from having someone else do to the formal job of worshipping for you.  If I need to feel the presence of God, I just look out at nature.

I don’t seek religious or spiritual experiences through sex play, either.  I don’t look to transcend earthly reality or to find metaphysical enlightenment via intense experiences in the playroom any more than I look for them on the dance floor during a really hot line dance or taking the curves on a fast-moving two-wheeled vehicle.

(Maybe it’s my analytical, Virgo nature as well.  I seek understanding, not that which cannot be understood.)

All this said, despite not looking for spirituality in my sex play, I have had extreme experiences during sex which others might attribute to the godhead.  On the basest level, this has included sensations of floating, being physically disconnected from the events, and “going to my happy place” (complete mentally separated from what is going on).  Fisting is especially prone to these feelings, with its extreme sensations and deep connection with the play partner.  The sensory deprivation from a hood can also provoke these sorts of sensations.  Mild drug use like poppers and pot can also be contributory factors.

On several occasions, I have seen balls of energy and even neon lightning flash around the play space.  I routinely speak in tongues during a scene and afterwards may have quiver reactions similar to seizures (or aftershocks).  I have experienced at least one genuine out-of-body experience, seeing the entire scene from several feet above.  And one time I saw elder gods and screamed in terror.  (Note: elder gods don’t respect safewords.)

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